Intimacy and transparency in cyber relationships
Saying that you met your spouse on match.com or Facebook may no longer raise eyebrows. The fact is that online communication has not only impacted the business world; it has equally impacted our personal lives. Yet even in this very digital era, biology always wins over technology. Online communities such as Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, Linked In, and blogs have created opportunities for people to increase their circle of friends and acquaintances. Something about hiding behind a computer screen and communicating through text makes it easier for some people to express themselves, and to expose their true personalities. It also makes it easy for them to create a false persona, and this is where integrity and transparency in cyber relationships become important.
Psychology will show that intimacy and trust are intertwined. How do you get intimacy in relationships? By showing others the real you, and sharing aspects of your life. Life on the Internet is no different. If you want people to trust you, you’ve got to be transparent about who you are. Even now when people are more open to sharing aspects of their lives on the net, they still operate with some level of apprehension. Why? Trust becomes an issue.
As someone who’s online through my blog, Facebook, and networking communities, I sometimes receive emails from persons seeking information or trying to make contacts. I love this facet of social media – its ability to expose you to new people, and to even create a true example of six degrees of separation. However, I won’t make friends with a stranger represented by a photograph of a question mark on Facebook. Despite its many benefits, the Internet is rife with opportunities for people to gather intelligence about your life. Criminal elements such as con artists and identity robbers can make your life troublesome if you make a wrong step on the web. When you’re online, you should always consider “what’s too close for comfort”.
When it comes to business partnerships, I cannot and will not partner with someone I don’t know a thing about; I’m not alone in this mentality. Professionals need to remember that if they want to network online, and reap business benefits from these connections, they’ve got to truthfully represent themselves to whomever it is they’re reaching. If you want to maximise your online branding, ensure that you have spaces where people can learn more about you. Google is not about to lose its lofty position as a high god of search engines, so use this to your advantage. Someone will not agree to work or partner with you on projects if they don’t have background information to help inform their decisions. So give it to them.
People are increasingly comfortable with online interaction, but that doesn’t mean that the principles of psychology and sociology are outdated. People still hold on to personal, face-to-face conversations. Belonging to a group or network still hinges on whether other individuals want to be associated with whatever social category you fall into. Belief systems are also most enjoyed when shared. Ever heard a marketer or consumer say, “I can’t represent that brand because I don’t believe in what they sell or I don’t agree with the way they conduct business”? Belief systems play a role in people’s decisions to rally around your brand, personal or corporate. Values, trust, integrity and transparency are crucial to the success of online relationships. This is why the future of marketing communications, public relations and business does not hinge on technology alone. The dynamics of socialisation dictate that we have the information that will help us to decide what or who we want to be associated with. People won’t gravitate towards you just because you ask them to. They will gravitate towards you because of your appeal, your energy, your contribution, and who you are. But they can only know who you are if you show them.
The Internet is rock steady in its necessity to the human race. But regardless of how technology influences the way we interact, the way we live, and the stories we tell, the fact that we are human means that some things will always remain the same.
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